As a 21-year-old woman who has never been on a date, I’ve found myself facing a dilemma that many young adults experience: should I go on this date or not? It all started when I was out recently, and a slightly older guy asked for my number. He’s been texting me every day, showing a genuine interest. Everything seems fine, but I have some doubts that I can’t shake off.
He’s in his mid-20s, works in retail, and doesn’t seem to have much ambition beyond his current job. On the other hand, I’m someone with a clear vision for my future. I’m ambitious, and I don’t know how this relationship could work, especially if his goals don’t align with mine. I’m also insecure because, at 21, I’ve never been on a date before and don’t feel like I have many options. Most of my past interactions with men have been focused on physical attraction rather than emotional connections.
I want to find out if I should give this date a chance or if I’m judging him too harshly. My first-ever date is important to me, and I also feel insecure because I’ve never had a chance to meet someone organically—especially in today’s dating world where it feels like everyone’s online.
Hexagram 34: Da Zhuang (Great Power) – What Does It Mean for My Decision?
As I reflected on these questions, I turned to the I Ching for guidance. The hexagram I drew was Hexagram 34: Da Zhuang (Great Power), which is associated with great strength, potential, and courage. This is a powerful hexagram that provides insight into how to navigate life’s challenges with confidence and self-assurance.
Key Messages from Da Zhuang:
- Embrace Your Inner Strength:
Da Zhuang encourages the use of your inner power and conviction to overcome obstacles. In the context of my question, it suggests that I have the strength to make a decision and follow through with it. Whether I choose to go on this date or not, I need to trust my own judgment and believe that I have the capability to navigate this situation confidently. - Confidence in Taking Action:
Da Zhuang highlights the importance of action and confidence. The hexagram suggests that waiting for the “perfect” moment or for everything to align perfectly may not be the answer. Instead, the key is to trust the process of growth and take action, even if it’s a step into the unknown. This means I should not let fear or insecurity hold me back. If I decide to go on the date, I can approach it with the self-assurance that comes from knowing I am in control of my decisions. - Overcoming Self-Doubt:
The hexagram also advises me to overcome self-doubt. It acknowledges that while there may be concerns about the future of this relationship, I should trust my instincts and not let insecurities cloud my judgment. Da Zhuang teaches that true power lies in trusting your own wisdom and taking steps to further your personal growth.
How Does This Apply to My Decision?
- The Importance of Self-Trust: Drawing on the wisdom of Hexagram 34, I can see that the decision to go on the date isn’t just about him or the situation—it’s about trusting myself and my ability to handle whatever comes next. Whether I choose to go or not, I have the power to manage my own life and decisions. The hexagram encourages me to embrace the unknown with confidence and take steps that align with my personal values.
- Growth Through Action: Da Zhuang shows that taking action, even if it’s outside my comfort zone, could bring growth and new opportunities. If I decide to go on the date, I may learn something new about myself, about relationships, and about what I value in a partner. If I decide not to go, it’s an equally valid choice that reflects my understanding of what I want from a relationship at this stage in my life.
- Balancing Expectations with Reality: Da Zhuang teaches that strength isn’t just about raw power—it’s also about balance and self-awareness. While I may feel insecure about not having been on a date at 21, this is my journey, and I’m empowered to shape it. It’s okay to take things one step at a time, even if they don’t fit into the perfect ideal I have in mind.
Key Takeaways:
- Embrace your inner power and trust your instincts in relationships.
- Don’t let self-doubt or external pressures dictate your choices.
- Taking action and stepping into the unknown can lead to personal growth.
- Stay true to your values and be patient with yourself, even if your path doesn’t follow conventional timelines.
Conclusion: Should I Go on This Date?
Based on the wisdom of Hexagram 34: Da Zhuang, the answer is clear: I should trust myself and make the decision that feels right in the moment. If I choose to go on the date, I can do so with the confidence that I’m taking steps toward growth and understanding. If I choose not to go, I will have made a decision that aligns with my values and personal goals.
Ultimately, Da Zhuang reminds me that true power comes from trusting my journey and embracing the steps I take along the way, no matter what others may think or what uncertainties arise.
