Love or Career? An I Ching Reading on Choosing Where to Live

I’m at a point where I have to make a decision—like, by tomorrow—and I keep flipping back and forth. I’m 22, just starting my career, and have a 9–5 job. My girlfriend, also 22, is finishing her final year in a study program. We’ve been together for two years, and I love her deeply. We’re not moving in together just yet—her current lease doesn’t allow it—but that could be an option next September.

I have two housing choices:

Option A: Stay closer to her. I’d be living alone in a nicer apartment, in a better building, with a vibe more suited to people my age. It’s not certain I’d see her every day—maybe half the week if we’re lucky, depending on our social lives and schedules. Commute would be longer and more expensive, but I’d be in the heart of the city.

Option B: Live with a close friend, pay less rent, and be close to work. But the area just doesn’t feel like home to me. It’s quieter, outside the city, and honestly just… not where I picture myself right now. I’d see my girlfriend once or twice a week at most if I go this route.

Here’s the thing—I almost want to make the “wrong” decision. I know staying near her means more stress, more money spent, and more logistical headaches. But something in me says I’d rather be miserable on the train than happy in the wrong place. I’d rather take that risk now than play it safe and wonder later. Maybe I need to make this kind of mistake to learn something real.

Am I being stupid? Or is this just what being young and in love is supposed to feel like?

You drew Hexagram 49: Revolution (革)

This is a powerful and rare hexagram to receive when asking about a major life decision. Revolution signals not a subtle shift, but a meaningful transformation—a break from the old that no longer fits, and the start of something more authentic to who you’re becoming.

Interpretation

Revolution is not reckless—it’s necessary.

The ancient text says:

“Revolution. On the day it is completed, there is truth. Supreme success. Favorable to be correct. No regrets.”

You’re not just choosing where to live. You’re choosing how you want to shape your life at 22, a moment when identity, values, and freedom are colliding. And the I Ching is telling you: this is the moment to act.

What the Hexagram Says About Your Situation

• You’ve already outgrown your comfort zone.
  You said it yourself: the place near work “just doesn’t feel like me.” That discomfort isn’t incidental—it’s a signal. You’re ready for more, even if it costs more. Revolution comes when the old model no longer supports who we’re becoming.
• Making the ‘wrong’ choice might be exactly right.
  You’re not chasing convenience—you’re chasing meaning. The commute might be harder. The budget tighter. But if your soul feels more alive in the city, closer to your partner, then that struggle becomes meaningful—not wasted.
• You won’t regret a choice made with integrity.
  The line “No regrets” means: if you act in alignment with your inner truth—even if it’s inconvenient—you won’t look back in doubt. You’ll know you honored who you were at that moment in time.

Final Guidance

This is not about choosing love over work. It’s about choosing the life that feels real.

Revolution doesn’t promise ease. It promises growth.

If you know where your heart lives, go there—even if the road is harder.

Some decisions shape us more than they serve us. This may be one of them.